Welcome to my column, “CHANGED MY LIFE” which will feature a new life-changing product, service or experience for each week. (PS I’m looking for ideas, suggestions, and guest-writers for this column! Email me: thedirtybeautyzara@gmail.com).
My darling friend (let’s call her “Georgina”) had been looking suspiciously fresh-faced over the past several months.
That’s how this whole charade got started. Georgina and her otherworldly glow.
I first noticed her sparkly new appearance over dinner at Antique Garage in Soho.
Has Georgina been doing Sakara Life or another one of those exorbitant organic, raw, vegan food delivery systems, Victoria Secret models are always hawking?
I watched her dip a truffle fry into a porcelain cup of garlic aioli.
Well, that answered the question.
Truffle fries and wine aren’t usually permitted whilst cleansing (hence why I rarely stick to a cleanse. What is life without truffle fries and Sauvignon blanc?).
Did she get a laser treatment? Has she suddenly been sleeping ten hours a night? Has she been getting incessantly laid? Is she using a magical serum that I need to know about? I was bursting at the proverbial seams with an endless slew of questions.
“Okay, Georgina, what the f*ck?” I finally asked. The words tumbled out of me furious and fast, like a car speeding down the Autobahn.
Georgina smiled primly. She knew *exactly* what I was talking about. She batted her lashes like a 1950s ingénue.
“Zara, whatever do you mean?”
She wasn’t going to let me off easily.
“Okay, bitch. Why does your skin look so…beautiful? Why do you look so…rested? WHAT CLEANSE HAVE YOU BEEN ON, UP UNTIL TONIGHT?” I took a dramatic gulp of my wine bracing myself for her to deliver the bad news: She’d been living off almonds and kale.
“I’m not on a cleanse. It’s Botox. Obviously.”
I felt my ears perk up like little meerkats. “Really?”
“You’re surprised?” Georgina rolled her eyes. “Like you’ve never done it before?”
“I haven’t. I’ve been scared of looking like the Cat Lady. It’s bad enough I live in New Jersey now. One can’t live in New Jersey and look like the Cat Lady.” I shuddered. (If you don’t know what I’m referring to, google “Cat Lady NYC.”).
“Do I look like the goddamn Cat Lady?”
I shook my head. She didn’t look like the Cat Lady. Not in the slightest.
Georgina simply looked remarkably exfoliated, youthful and awake. Which is rare for an overworked Manhattanite. City life tends to drag the skin down. All that time breathing in pollution can give a gray pallor to the face. And the perpetual stressed-out pout permanently fixed onto New Yorkers faces — the perpetual frown derived from the trauma of spending half of your paycheck on rent and the other half on cabs — isn’t exactly youthful.
I touched the sides of my eyes. The skin didn’t feel smooth. It felt..crepey.
“I’m going to do it.” I declared, looking into the distance, envisioning a prettier future.
There was only one place I would consider getting Botox: The Elite Medical Spa of Sarasota, formerly known as The Laser Lounge Spa of Sarasota.
Let me tell you why: I’m terrified of bad injectables.
I’ve seen it on my friends and I’ve seen it on my enemies.
I’ve seen it on the television and I’ve seen it on the Subway.
I’ve seen it in the most glamorous restaurants in New York City and I’ve seen it in dive bars.
Bad injectables don’t discriminate. They can happen to anyone, anywhere.
And to be perfectly transparent, an overdone face skeeves me out. That bug-eyed, frozen-looking, Tammy Faye Bakker face — the kind where the eyes look perpetually astonished and forehead looks glass — it gives me anxiety.
I don’t want to look back at my reflection and feel even more anxiety than I already feel (I have acne scars that taunt me regularly)! If I’m going to subject my face to a needle, I want to strut into the world with feeling better about my appearance, not worse.
And about two years ago I had my lips injected (read about the experience here) at The Elite Medical Spa of Sarasota by the owner and master injector, Jeff Goldstein.
Jeff slayed my lips. They looked amazing. (In fact, I plan on doing them again soon).
I loved the way he took his time, I loved the careful, artful meditative flow-state he enters when piercing your skin with a needle.
And honestly, I like his vibe. Unlike other Med Spas I’ve been to, there is no attitude or pretention at The Elite Medical Spa of Sarasota. It’s a beautiful space that doesn’t feel scary and sterile and medical, on the contrary, it’s warm and cozy and beautiful, while still managing to be extraordinarily clean and professional.
I trust Jeff and I trust The Elite Medical Spa of Sarasota which is everything because when undergoing a medical beauty treatment you are rendered vulnerable. (Also I trust Jeff because all of my hot friends go to him. I can’t tell you *who* exactly, but I can assure you the hot ones, they all go to Injector Jeff).
I booked my appointment for the day after Thanksgiving and arrived in his office at 10AM with a colossal hangover.
Jeff, as smiley and handsome as ever, assured me I was going to have ~subtle~ yet ~visible~ results. I made some faces for him (frowning, smiling, smirking) as he dutifully studied the existing (and forthcoming) lines in my weathered face.
I relinquished control and let the artist get to work. In fact, that’s a tip I have for all of you looking to get injections. Find an injector with intrinsically good taste and let them do their thing, man. They know what they’re doing and when you let an artist (an injector *is* an artist) lead the way, your results will be fire.
I was the most surprised as to how little the whole process hurt. I was deathly hungover and frail and even then it didn’t feel like much more than a tiny pinch! Honestly, (to me) it didn’t feel much different than acupuncture (however we all have different pain tolerances, and I’ve been told mine is rather high. Purr).
Jeff told me I would notice the results within a few days, but it would probably look best after about a week to ten days. By the next morning, my mother noticed that my eyebrows looked higher. Not scary high, raised in an appealing way that opened up my bleary eyes.
After a week, I’m not going to lie; I felt pretty damn sexy. I had an arch in my brow for the first time ever, which greatly pleased me. I mean the brows frame the entire face and I’ve always coveted that bitchy, sharp Angelina Jolie arch in my brow. My forehead definitely looked smoother. My crow’s feet were completely gone. And my eyes looked more…alive.
I ~really~ noticed it on camera. This video was filmed exactly seven days after the procedure.
Between week one and week two every morning felt like Christmas morning! I woke up excited, rushing off to the mirror, for the results got better and better with each passing day. By day fourteen it had peaked. (It hasn’t dropped off, it’s remained at day fourteen prime and it’s been about six weeks).
Hand-to-heart, I *love* Botox. I knew it would make my forehead look shinier and firmer, but what I didn’t expect was this: It softened the appearance of my acne scars.
I swear to Lana Del Rey.
“You look like you’re walking around with the ‘Paris’ Instagram filter!” My friend Dayna told me. “I WANT BOTOX!” She glared at me, her brown eyes flickering beneath her extra-long eyelash extensions.
You know you’ve done the right thing when your most savage, most brutally honest friend looks at you with jealous eyes.
I’m never not going without Botox again, kids. (But I’m only going to Jeff because like, he gets it).
Not one person has asked me if I’ve had anything “done” I’ve only been pressed with questions like “Wow, you look really good. Are you using new skincare?”
Sometimes I wish I was the kind of girl who could lie and say “Yes, darling it’s skincare” but that’s against my strict moral code as a woman. Being a woman in this day and age is tough enough, I can’t add to the impossible societal beauty pressures by pretending I achieved these incredible results through skincare. No, Queen, no. A serum isn’t going to get rid of your crow’s feet and give you a brow arch, honey. No matter what they tell you.
Anywhoo, I decided since so many of you have hinted that you, too, are ~curious~ about my new steady girlfriend Botox, I might as well ask the master himself to answer our collective questions.
So here it is, a fabulous Botox Q & A with the incomparable Injector Jeff Goldstein.
Q: First off, how much Botox did I get and where did I get it?
A: We injected a total of 30 units of Botox in your forehead, glabella (middle of your brows) and crows feet. We did “Baby Botox” on you since you are new to it and your wrinkles are minimal.
Q: What is Botox? Like where does it come from, what is this mysterious, magical substance we all love so much?
A: Botox is used to remove wrinkles by temporarily relaxing muscles. It is made from a neurotoxin called botulinum toxin that is produced by the bacterium Clostridium botulinum. It sounds harsh, but in all the years I have been injecting it, I have never seen a bad reaction from it. As long as the injector knows anatomy and appropriate dosage, it’s very, very safe.
Q: Now, tell us, how do you define baby Botox and who is baby Botox good for? Everyone keeps talking about it, but what exactly IS it?
A: Baby Botox is basically a smaller dose of Botox for clients looking to prevent new wrinkles and treat mild current wrinkles. It’s a great option for clients wanting to try it while still looking natural.
Q: Have you seen a trend where younger people are getting Botox? How do you feel about it? Is there such a thing as TOO young? At what point are you a good Botox candidate?
A: Every time we raise our brows, smile or give a mean look or squint, we are using muscles that create wrinkles. That repetitive movement will eventually create wrinkles. Botox basically prevents that movement and ultimately prevents the wrinkles from occurring. More and more, younger clients are getting Botox to prevent any wrinkles from ever occurring.
Q: Have you seen a trend where younger people are getting Botox? How do you feel about it? Is there such a thing as TOO young? At what point are you a good Botox candidate?
A: It’s funny because age doesn’t always mean you *do* or you *don’t* need Botox. I have 21 year-olds with more wrinkles than a 40-year-old. This is because of muscle strength and repetitive movement. If a client has wrinkles at rest (not moving), I feel they are good candidates for Botox. I also think preventative Botox is a great option in addition to daily skincare and sun protection.
Q: Why does Botox make the skin so smooth and shiny? Is it good for people with acne scars as well as wrinkles? I have to say, I feel like my forehead looks smoother, not just from fine lines but from pitted acne scars.
A: When Botox is injected, the targeted muscles are pretty much “shut off” below the skin. Without using those muscles, the skin smooths out and even scars look better.
Q: What the hell is a “lip flip” and why is everyone talking about it?!
A: The Lip Flip is a great option for clients who want a bigger lip pout in the upper lip. I usually recommend it for clients who may be thinking about getting lip filler. Typically, I will inject between 4 and 8 units to achieve this and can last 2-3 months.
Q: What are the most common areas people treat? What are some areas that we wouldn’t think of where Botox might be beneficial?
A: Botox is most commonly used in the glabella, forehead and crows feet. We use it off label for a lot of things. We can treat a gummy smile with it, prevent the tip of the nose from pointing down when you smile, treat the little “bunny lines” around our noses, slim a wide face with Botox injected to the chewing muscles, relax the neck bands to improve the neck appearance, prevent chin dimpling, turn the corners of the mouth so we don’t look like we’re frowning. There are so many ways we can use Botox.
Q: Tell us all about the armpit Botox thing? Is it bad for you to put it into your armpits? Is it common?
A: Excessive sweating is treated with Botox and works amazing! The armpits, scalp (Blotox), hands, feet, and buttocks have all been injected in our practice. My husband suffers from hyperhidrosis in his armpits and I have been injecting him for years. It typically will last around a year for him. It’s totally safe and now FDA approved.
(Note: I just researched “Blotox” and learned that tons of women are getting botox injected into their scalp to make their BLOWOUTS last longer! As a girl with unmanageable hair who often skips workouts so I don’t f*ck up my hair, I just MIGHT have to try this!).
Q: How much Botox is too much Botox? What gives people an artificial look?
A: Some clients like to be “frozen” and not be able to move any of the facial muscles. Personally, it doesn’t always look natural with too much Botox.
Q: How much should we expect to pay for Botox?
A: Botox pricing varies and is typically between $10 and $15 per unit. Botox is injected by the unit and the number of units is based on how much muscle strength a client has. If a client has strong facial muscles, typically a higher amount of units are used. Depending on the price per unit, the total cost can really vary. Our office on average injects 30-40 units per treatment and the price is between $255 and $340. The treatment will last between 3-4 months.
Q: Is there an art to Botox? What should we look for when finding a Botox injector?
A: Finding a great injector is key. It’s important to know you’re going to someone who is a medical professional, well-trained and is able to help you look and feel rejuvenated. There is definitely an art and understanding of anatomy to be good at injecting. No client is the same and every client has to be treated with a personalized treatment plan.
Q: What are your thoughts on Kybella? We have lots of questions about Kybella! What is it? Who is it good for?
A: Kybella is an FDA approved fat cell destroyer for the double chin. It works great, but only for specific clients. Client selection is key. First, the client has to have fat, not just loose skin under the chin and second, good bounce back in the skin. Clients typically need between 2 and 4 vials depending on how much fat is present. I have been also using it for small pockets of fat all over the body. I have had good results with it for back fat, breast fat, Jowl fat and above the knee fat. The key is to select the *right* candidate.
Q: Pimp yourself out! Where can people find you, see you, follow you?
A: My name is Jeff Goldstein, Board Certified Physician Assistant, Master Cosmetic Injector. I inject full time at my medical spa and have over 16 years of experience. I inject Botox, Fillers, perform tattoo removal and treat acne scars five days a week. You can follow me on IG “InjectorJeff.”
You can call and see me at my Medspa and call 941-203-5111 to book!
(If you do, tell them your big sister Z sent you! They’ll be ~extra~ nice).
My debut book GIRL, STOP PASSING OUT IN YOUR MAKEUP: THE BAD GIRL’S GUIDE TO GETTING YOUR SH*T TOGETHER is available NOW on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, IndieBound, and BAM! If you send me a screenshot of your preorder, I’ll send you swag!
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